Friday, July 13, 2012

Deliciousness of bugs and other pests, in descending order, according to my cat (level of tastiness was deduced by evaluating which ones she murders and eats, which ones she murders and chews but ultimately decides not to ingest, and which ones she just kills and leaves on my kitchen floor):

1. Ladybugs
2. Small-ish flying bugs (ex: mosquitos)
3. Hair ties
4. Flies
5. Mice
6. Ants

An unexpected bonus of cat ownership has been the regular protection from small, disgusting creatures that crawl into my apartment. If something is moving and is under six inches tall, she will attempt to eat it (even if it is a hair tie and it is not moving). This is comforting because I am not fond of insects and once convinced my entire family to move out of our home because we had an invasion of ants (it is possible there were other motives but I was very convincing). I don't have to lie awake worrying that this is the night I will swallow one of eight spiders we supposedly consume a year, because she will be on my face and will not stop attacking it until the spider has ceased living its miserable little spider life (though it isn't really fair for me to judge a spider's quality of life - that old line about "walking a mile in another's (eight) shoes, etc. etc.). Instead of doing the killing myself, I just pick her up and put her down in front of the offender and stand back while she stalks her tiny prey. This is also cheaper than buying her toys. Or paying for cable (it is very entertaining). I cheer her on from the sidelines, letting her know that we are all here for her and that she can do it and to please get all of the ants and not just the slow ones. I have restored the natural order of the world!

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