Friday, January 14, 2011

Going back to school ... maybe?

I have recently applied for a Master's degree in Art Education at a university in Boston. I am very excited about the opportunity and am now biting my nails (but mostly others' nails) in anticipation of their decision. Of course I've been out of school for over four years, and it's not uncommon to be nervous about going back. However, the only evident fear a return to school has provoked is the lingering possibility of arriving at school out of uniform, late, having forgotten my locker combination, my class schedule, and how to negotiate the inside of a rather small building. I went to a Catholic high school where we had to adhere to a dress code, something that seems to be sticking with me for life because this month alone I've woken up from at least seven separate nightmares in which I had forgotten about the dress code and was cast out by some very scary faculty members. As a result of my private education, to this day I cannot put on a pair of khaki pants without passing out.

I think we tend to give our subconscious mind too much credit. For instance, it's curious that despite the fact that high school and graduate school are two very separate things, my subconscious seems unable to accept the distinction and move on from the past, resulting in many dreams about trying to find a friend inside the cafeteria. If my dreams are trying to tell me something, such as that should I be accepted to graduate school, it will be an almost identical, nauseating experience as high school was, then my subconscious and I are absolutely not paying to go back to school.

A more appropriate nightmare about returning to school would be the likelihood of all the seats in every coffee shop in Cambridge being entirely filled all day long, every day.

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