Friday, May 22, 2009

For those of you who forgot what a hangover feels like

They are excruciating. I nearly decided to conveniently "forget" that I worked on Fridays, but I wasn't sure how believable that sounded. (Hi Mom! Hi Dad!) I have revised my job description to include sleeping face-down at my desk. People should not drink "bowls" of any kind of beverage, particularly when it requires seven straws to finish the job. Also, if you can't pick up a martini because you lack the dexterity required to pick up said martini without spilling it everywhere, you probably should not be drinking martinis in the first place. My organs simply refuse to cooperate together as a team and are instead insisting that they each carry out their own artistic method of destroying me. I probably haven't felt this terrible since my last hangover. Of course, showing up unexpectedly at some swank bar in the South End being the only one dressed like a teenager whose entire wardrobe consists of clothing from American Eagle their parents wouldn't let them out of the house with is always fun. My brother is coming into town today so naturally I want to show him a good time by being incredibly moody and irritable and sleeping a lot.

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