If I've learned anything about successful relationships from watching romantic comedies, aside from that they take approximately 90 minutes to develop, it is that they all begin with a good story of how they first met. A good story can give an otherwise star-crossed romance at least an additional three months of survival time. Do you feel like all the good stories are taken? Have you never been particularly good at crafting a believable plot? I've drawn potential conclusions from some of the stories of people I know who are involved in relationships, that I think can serve as lessons and pointers for those who turn to this blog for romance advice because they don't have television and therefore cannot watch Dr. Phil.
1. Start more fires.
Recently, I heard a story from a teacher who was trying to microwave frozen pancakes for her second-grade class and ended up heating them too long, setting the microwave on fire, and short-circuiting the electricity. Summoned to her rescue via a frantic and fateful phone call was the courageous electrician. What's cuter than putting the lives of a roomful of children in imminent danger to attract a Union worker? End result: still together to this day, may be forcibly engaged as a result of my aunt accidentally blurting it out at dinner.
2. Go to bars and pretend to be new in town.
Now I hate to suggest this one, because it seems so obvious, but it involves my very existence so I can't resist. This may not surprise you to learn, but my parents met at a bar. Of course they made up a cute little story to tell the grand-kids involving a towed car, a blustery New England snowstorm, and a Jewish kid from Chicago trying to make it in a town full of Puritans, but the fact of the matter is they met at a bar, and that my dad won my mom's heart over a tray of highballs. Apple does not fall far from the tree. Lesson: the ladies can't resist the new guy.
3. Stalk them. This one is not so much a story as a personal motto of a dear (and anonymous) family member of mine, who has suggested I do the following on separate occasions:
- Establish residence in the city they are moving to on the other side of the country. Although you have only met them on two occasions, they will find the coincidence agreeable and be wiled by your dogged persistence (I wonder if she's ever seen Felicity?).
- Invite them to family dinner. Why not? Your family has done deductive reasoning and determined they are perfect for you. Why don't you invite his parents too?
- Have your family call and invite them to dinner without your knowledge. You have to wonder how you became involved in a situation where your family has access to your personal phonebook.