Monday, November 22, 2004

Day 2

The explanation for the title of this post is it is the second day I have clicked the "next blog" button to compare my blog to whatever blog was randomly selected, and ultimately to make me feel better about myself. And as luck would have it, I am still the winner of my own competition that no one else is taking part in. Actually, this is the point in the night where it is almost midnight and I have decided to increase the pressure of finishing the (2) papers that are due tomorrow at 930 am by giving myself even less time to write them. Anyhow, even though I again didn't read the blog content (I do not feel it is necessary...It's the 21st century, all that matters is outer appearances and initial reactions...duh.) Well, turns out I won by a landslide because the words "moral values" and "relgion" were mentioned in the first paragraph. Which means...well, that means I still have to write my papers.

So, (You think: Oh look at that ... she's starting a new paragraph: must mean she's got something important to say. No. I can assure you that nothing important will be said in this paragraph, just like all other paragraphs you can expect to read here.) So...I have invented a couple of handy "drinking games" for those of you out there who are lucky enough to be in that brief period in life where irresponsibility is encouraged : The American College Student. (Note to parents if you are reading: That was totally a joke! I have way too much respect for you guys to ever partake in such reckless behavior.), and I myself have had the pleasure of testing them out Saturday night. The first is called...hmmm um I'll have to think of that later. But the guidelines are as follows:

Number of players: 1-infinity...less people=more drunk

Rules: One person drinks until they feel inclined to discontinue. Person to immediate left begins drinking. Person drinks until they feel said incination. Process continues until a new drink is required, said person gets up to get a new drink, forgets what they were doing, and never returns to game.

Game Two:
Requires: deck of cards. Preferably cards that have been previously soaked in beer and do not shuffle appropriately anymore.
1. "Dealer" picks up card from deck (card is face down.)

2. Dealer points to designated player
3. Card is revealed
4. Card is multiplied by 5

5. Player must drink proportionately to number generated by multiplication
Keep in mind that he who holds the deck of cards has absolute authority over anyone in the room. No matter if the person has agreed to play or not, if they are pointed at, they shall drink.

Now obviously these games were designed to keep your motor skills, memory, and ability to reason in tact. I don't condone foulplay, wild behavior, or a general out-of-control-ness. I also don't support domestic violence or animal testing.

Obviously, the brilliance of these games is undeniable. If you end up getting obliterated, blacking out, waking up next to your english professor - don't come crying to me. Because chances are I am passed out under a foosbal table somewhere and I won't be able to help you.


brainhell said...

Drinking games? Feh.

Ashley said...

Feh? Feh? I can't even begin to imagine using that in an actual conversation. Or in any context whatsoever. The "drinking games" which are intended entirely tongue-in-cheek are solely for my own amusement. As is this web page. I am almost insulted. And that almost would be italicized but as it is a comment it is not possible.

Ashley said...

Here I go again, responding to myself. Anyway, as I said I was "almost" offended (to brainhell's monosyllabic potential insult...yes I really am that sensitive about my "writing" (another parentheses because I'm not positive I can actually call this writing, anyway))... that is until I paid Brainhell's blog a visit and cringed as he recounted, in detail, the various symptoms of a certain stomach irritation his children have been recently inflicted with. I believe I stopped after the words infection, hacking cough, and diarrhea had been used up to eleven times. no harm meant by anything...I think we all deserve a little space to talk about whatever we like. preferably things un-related to bodily functions of any kind.